Living well alone

Last week my husband Laughton would have turned ninety had he lived. Living without him has been something I’ve had to learn how to do, as many of my women friends of similar age also face. I’ve been living on my own for three years now. Some of the things I’ve had to work on are:

Not becoming a hermit. There are plenty of things to do at home, so it’s easy to just hunker down. But it’s always energising to meet others, even if it’s just chatting to a stranger walking a dog on the park.

Using my voice.  My daughter says on the phone – Mum you sound husky. Have you got a cold? I say –No. It’s just the first time I’ve used my voice all day. So I now try to remember to sing in the shower to keep my voice oiled.

Examining my shirt or jersey each morning for stains. There’s no one to say – You’re surely not going out in that outfit are you? You’ve got breakfast all down your front.

Not lying in bed too long. It’s so comfortable! Of course I can’t get up till I’ve done Wordle, shared my success or failure with competitive family members, messaged with my daughter who needs to be sure I didn’t die overnight, finished my cup of tea and checked what the weather will be so I can plan what to wear when I finally get up. It’s a lovely luxury, lying in bed but I do try to be showered dressed and breakfasted before it’s morning tea time!

I’m lucky of course. I have plenty of family and friends. Others must have to work much harder at living well alone. It’s an important skill and worth working at.